- It was Chinese new year eve yesterday. I had reunion dinner at home. My mom was around, but my dad wasn't. He had to work. Sad that my dad can't join us for dinner. Every year, it is only this time when we came together to eat dinner together. And it was a rare occasion that my mom don't have to work early. After that, I went out with my dear to chinatown to shop. There was something unexpected that happened though. She torn her shorts on the bus. That time, I really don't know what to do. I can't buy her shorts, because I don't know what design she wants. So I bought a T-shirt so she could tie around her waist to cover the shorts. We hugged, kissed and embraced each other throughout the night. It was really romantic. And this is the 1st time I held her hands. I just love her so much. But dear, actually I have something to tell you, but I don't know how to say it.
Dear,
Its been truly a great time when you're with me. I enjoyed every moment of it. The joy, happiness, sadness and tears. But as my love for you grows stronger each day, I'm also getting more and more fearful that I might lose you one day. I didn't dare to give my 100%, because there are just too many uncertainties. I'm afraid that mingli might not approve us. I'm afraid that you might not love me one day. I'm afraid that your 'daddy' might say that he likes you. I'm afraid of losing you. Somehow, I know that we have to face reality. Things don't last forever. And so, I'm trying to protect myself from getting hurt by not giving my best. I'm sorry dear. But I truly love you.
My friend once told me: Why do you always think so much? Why can't you treasure and enjoy what you have now and worry later? In a way, I have to agree to him. I know that I must treasure our every moment with you now because we don't know what the future holds for us. But right now, I want to make every moment count. I want to continue to love her deeply. Even if we breakup one day, I wouldn't regret it because I know that I have truly love you before with all my heart.
Dear.. I love you!
-- your dear
`Sometimes @ 1:46 PM
